White Trash People love the environment. Never mind the four abandoned cars on the front lawn leaking oil. That shit came out of the ground to begin with, so it doesn’t count.
When White Trash People talk environment, they really mean trees. You know what saves trees? Not reading books. That’s one of the reasons White Trash People prefer not to read.
But you know what saves even more trees? Not cutting them down. And you don’t have to cut down any trees to make fake wood paneling.
Fake wood paneling is not just enviro-friendly, it’s also a decorator’s dream because it goes with everything. Pleather, naugahyde, velour… If it’s made from fibers that don’t occur in nature, then you can cover a couch in it and put that couch in front of fake wood paneling, and it won’t look out of place.
Then you can sit on that couch and get super high. All day. And what’s more green than hydroponic weed?
Fake wood paneling also allows White Trash People to feel like they’re outside amongst nature while sitting in the comfort of their air conditioned basement. Some White Trash People even like to put a fake ficus in front of their fake wood paneling to increase the realness of the fakeness.
Finally, the brown color complements the vomit and urine stains on the carpet left from your son’s 8th grade graduation and parole party. Man that thing was off the hook. Everyone was so wasted, then they went and got burritos. Those were so fucking yummy.
So yeah, fake wood paneling is pretty awesome.
I’m pretty sure I can still taste the processed guacamole from those burritos at the parole party. Fan-fucking-tastic.
Your site is funny. But I’ve seen the photos of the meth lady you pictured before (actually she was featured on PBS) and her story is really tragic, she was actually a librarian who got caught up in a horrible life style after being raped. She’s dead now. The only purpose her life really served were those photographs, showing everyone the horrors of drug abuse.
I must admit to being confused. What exactly is not white trash? My wife and I go to Red Lobster and Olive Garden quite often, I do feel guilty knowing there are better restaurants out there, but we just don’t have the money to go, and they do seem “fancy.” I always demand more bread sticks too. We hit Outback alot too.
Meth or mullets are not a problem for us, but it would be helpful if you provided a link so those of us who are not sure if we are trash can compare. We do the best we can, but on a very limited income. By the way, my wife and I both have a graduate degrees, but from a state university…and yes I’m talking about liberal arts degrees.